Deadpool (2016) Rated-X as in eXcellent? Deadpool (2016) Rated-X as in eXcellent?
Stalks says: "Deadpool" is taking no prisoners! Deadpool (2016) Rated-X as in eXcellent?

What happens when you have a film project that has climbed out of development hell like Bruce Wayne climbed out of that Gulag in The Dark Knight Rises? OK, bad comparison because that scene was bullshit!!

Anyway, a movie based on Deadpool as well as a few other Marvel Intellectual Properties was proposed since the year 2000 and after sixteen years, the project has finally reached fruition! Yay!

From the studio that inexplicably sewed his fucking mouth shut the first time, comes… me!

When the X-Men spinoff film about a certain Adamantium clawed Mutant debuted back in 2008, the movie was poorly received and rightfully so. However, if there was one “redeeming” factor I can take from X-Men Origins: Wolverine, is uh, um…ah..the Videogame adaptation from Activision!!

mmmmphh

Yeah, that’s it! Oh and to a lesser degree, it gave us Deadpool’s first cinematic appearance.  Yes, the opportunity was severely wasted and it’s unfortunate when you weigh in the fact that actor Ryan Reynolds’ performance had demonstrated good potential.

how it shouldve started.

Fast forward Eight years later and low and behold not only does “The Merc with the Mouth” has his own movie, but it has Reynolds reprising his role from Origins and all I can say is it was a long time coming but it paid off in a huge way!

*Sick BURN*

*Sick BURN*

 

Directed by Tim Miller and written by Rhett Reese and Paul Wernick. Y’know, the guys behind Zombieland and the not so good sequel to those Real American Heroes, Deadpool is part dark comedy , part superhero and all attitude with the titular character on a mission to settle scores and bury scars . (Such as the ones on his face.)

The movie wastes no time when it comes to exciting  sequences starting with the rather quirky intro loaded with fan service humor (anyone noticed the Green Lantern action figure)?

Sometime afterwards, Wade Wilson AKA Deadpool elasticities a complete backstory of how he became this smart-assed assassin with a soft spot in his heart. In layman’s terms it’s a classic love story of Boy meets Girl, Boy fucks girl, then boy passes out only to find out that he has been diagnosed with terminal cancer and with little time left to spend with his fiancée Vanessa Carlyle, (played by the beautiful girl of GOTHAM-Morena Baccarin). Out of desperation Wade volunteers to become part of this trial experiment that may rid him of cancer once and for all. But that’s not necessarily the case as he learns that the experimental clinic was just a ruse for something more sinister.

After being injected with mutant DNA, Wilson discovers that his body can regenerate and what’s even better, his cancer is cured! Too good to be true?  Fuck yeah! Especially now that Wade’s “good looks” have been replaced with something horrendous. Pissed and bitter, Deadpool goes after the man responsible for his disfigurement-Francis Freeman who goes under the pseudonym- “Ajax”.

freedy

Thus fast forward to the present where Wade..er, now “Deadpool “ is  seen unmercifully  slicing, dicing and shooting the shit outta Ajax’s goon squad and the rest continues on from there.

What I really loved about this film is that it’s very unapologetic and isn’t afraid to take shots at the comic and film industry.  Its pretty much tongue and cheek and I’m talking literally!  (The sex scenes between Wade and Vanessa were very graphic to the extent of DP taking it up the Poop chute via strap on!!! What some Guys would do for love.)  My friends and I were surprised that parents actually took their kids to see this film that more than justified a hard-R rating. It’s not as if Deadpool was used as some marketing tool to sell toys..right?…..right??

Hot-Toys-MMS347-Deadpool-Movie-Figure-Wielding-Pistols-e1451925392917

But wait!! Deadpool isn’t all about gratuitous violence, nudity, profanity and fucking… OK, a large part of it is but that’s not the sole reason of why this movie is so good. Personally, I loved the hell out of DP’s fourth wall breaks that spare no expense when taking jabs at pop culture references and especially the movie industry.

Its as if the protagonist had taken the viewer along on his mission to get some well-deserved payback. Again, the standout comedic scenes consist mostly of lampooning superhero tropes and clichés. What was absent was the walking away from explosions however, the inside jokes more than made up for it from the three point landing to the slow motion trio of heroes walking. Speaking of whom, the “Mutant of Steel”, Colossus shows up and he gets more air time than compare to the previous X-Men movies. And like Peter Rasputin from the comics, he comes off very adamant as some “Boy scout” when attempting to recruit Wade into the X-Men and in doing so, he often gives lectures about what it really means to be a hero, something Deadpool is certainly not!

colossus-deadpool

The dynamic between Deadpool, Colossus and the newest edition to the X-Men; Negasonic Teenage Warhead was so impressive,  that one can only hope for a sequel strictly aimed toward the trio. (After the hints that were mentioned during post credits, it’s a strong possibility and then some!)

oh just you wait

Rounding out the film’s cast is Wade’s equally obnoxious BFF, Weasel who further helped to deliver the endless supply of laughs as well as Wade’s roommate Al (Played by Leslie Uggams) and if that wasn’t enough, there were a few good scenes with the Cab Driver who DP always manage to stiff after reaching his destination. Yes, there’s even a cameo from Mr. “Excelsior” himself.) Deadpool is inept, obnoxious, and irresponsible to the point of him accidentally leaving his weapons cache in the backseat of the cab prior to taking down his targets. But yet for some reason, you can’t help to cheer for this anti-hero.

Francis, the main antagonist Ajax came off like an uninspired generic supervillain so it’s quite obvious that he’ll end up as bullet fodder. MMA fighter, now turned “Actress” Gina Carano shows up as his henchman Angel Dust and looking badass as ever. I doubt she’ll return for the possible sequel as well but at least she has the chops to play a super powered nemesis in other films perhaps. That being said, Carano should take further acting lessons – not that I would personally tell her. The slowest part of the film goes to the underground clinic, but it’s a mere 15 or so minutes that can be endured.

Ah, Gina..a Bone crusher who is built to take some form of "punishment"! (0:<

Ah, Gina..a Bone crusher who is built to take some form of “punishment”! (0:<

 

Seeing DP in action with his Katanas reminded me of the first Blade movie and not even that film is safe from the constant pop culture references and jabs. Oh, no sir! Ryan Reynolds has more than redeemed himself from previous Comic oriented clunkers despite the fact that it took a fourth attempt?!?

Y'see, DP even rescues Cats..just as long as it's not Ollie.

Y’see, DP even rescues Cats…just as long as it’s not Ollie.

 

Deadpool raises the bar as far as R-Rated Superhero Movies goes and if you like laughs, blood and boobs with your Superheroics, then this is one “pool” you wouldn’t mind jumping into! Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to play the videogame in a few minutes!

Recommended for: Comic readers, those who liked the first Blade- and Kick Ass- films.

Also recommended, my fellow SN contributor and colleague Kenchun’s  impeccable review in case any of you haven’t read it.

 

Stalks, out!

Author Image

Stalkeye

. Satirist, Gamer, Artist and Pop Culture commentator- Stalks offers his outspoken views on on most things Geek related as well as WTF is wrong with the world today!

  • Kylo Ronin

    Quick note, it’s T.J. MIller, not Tim Miller, who plays Weasel.

  • Toruk_Makto

    The interactions with Colossus
    http://49.media.tumblr.com/f1f86aa5aa633f17105cf9b4307adac6/tumblr_nzvkuwTv0R1tw9yl5o1_400.gif
    and NTW
    https://media.giphy.com/media/7YIibr3NlarLi/giphy.gif
    were some of the best parts for me. Very entertaining.
    I don’t know if Fox will ever get anything right again after this…but this movie rocked.

  • Orcus

    If the studios ever decided to NEVER make another superhero movie, Orcus will be cool with that since Orcus beheld the glory that is Deadpool. Just stop trying after this

  • Sagamanus

    I think the amount of Colossus we got was just right. Perfect mix of him and Negasonic, but I think they should have interacted more and not just with Deadpool.

  • Stalkeye

    “OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPS”
    Does my mistake warrant a Flagging? 😛
    T.J. vis-a-vis Tim has been corrected.
    <—Not to self: Never finish an article when coming down with an hangover from Happy Friday Hour!!

    And for the heads up and here's your reward!

  • Stalkeye

    Fucking right it did! FOX had taken a moderate risk via practically gave Miller & co. The keys to the Kingdom and this is the result of creative freedom.

  • Stalkeye

    It was fine the way it was. Deadpool was the focal character and this film was practically seen from his eyes. Nega and Colossus going outside the “context” would have been a bit much dont’cha think?

  • CoolHandJuke

    I’m going back to the 70’s / 80’s to bang chicks. Where should I start: Bernadette Peters or Madeline Kahn?

  • Dee

    What about Nancy Travis?

  • jim83

    I don’t know, i really wanted to like this movie a lot but i found it just ok.I appreciate that the creators did exactly what they wanted to do and the fact that they made it R but not a lot of scenes stood out for me and the humour wasn’t that great.The highway scene was very good but the constant back and forth with the narrative killed all it’s momentum. Colossus was absolutely great, the character was spot on from the comic books and made me realize the extend in which the character has been mishandled by Singer. Hopefully they can improve with the sequel but when it comes to R rated comic book films i still prefer both Kick Ass or Kingsmen than Deadpool.

  • KilliK

    they finally nailed Colossus.

  • KilliK

    why Gina is so fat in this movie?

  • jim83

    I don’t think she is fat but that hairstyle isn’t doing her any favors.

  • Toruk_Makto

    All they really need to do is just let the other characters/titles be themselves…don’t try to copy Deadpool.

    Fucking Hollywood…not everything has to use the same equation..they really don’t get the power that has kept comic books around for so long is eclecticism.

  • CoolHandJuke

    meh…

  • KilliK

    it’s still a restrained, made for mainstream, adaptation. Creepy points this out in his excellent review:

    http://247365hatemachine.blogspot.gr/2016/02/deadpool-reviewfact.html

  • CoolHandJuke

    should i be concerned her androgynous appearance is a turn on for me?

  • KilliK

    i dont know, she looks even fatter than her American Gladiator days.

  • KilliK

    I like how everybody is already talking about DP and have forgotten about TFA.
    heh.

  • Dee

    I think I will catch this on DVD.

  • Col. Tigh-Fighter

    I loved it. Cant wait for another one.

  • Toruk_Makto

    Nah, just means that even when she tries to cover it up, those XX chromosomes come pouring out.

    Just wish she wasn’t so damn young…makes my oogling feel uber creepy!

  • Toruk_Makto

    What’s TFA?….; ).

  • Zed

    Kim Cattrall or GTFO

  • Zed

    I would let Carano kick the stuffing out of me and then ask her to sign my pecs.

  • CoolHandJuke

    she’s legal, right? i feel fine oogling as long as i didn’t know about them before hand. case in point, the daughter from Modern Family, but she seems more like a dyke everyday, so it’s no big loss…

  • Toruk_Makto

    She’s 19 so you’re good.

    I’ve got kids older than she is so it screws with my dynamic a little…but not so much that I can’t appreciate.

    Never watched Modern Family….keep telling myself to get on that.

  • CoolHandJuke

    It’s terrible aside from Sophia’s jugs…

  • Orcus

    Aside from the fact that it past the 2 Billion mark worldwide, Ep 8 started filming, and Harrison Ford will be doing a presentation for Disney tonight on the new Star Wars Land.

    There you go, all caught up

  • Orcus

    That’s not fat, that girl is THICK!

    YEAH BABY! SMACK THAT ASS AND RIDE THE WAVE IN!

  • Orcus

    They just need people who know and love the character and who enjoy what they are doing as opposed to dealing with it like it was another check. It looks like they had a blast making this

  • KilliK

    and it seems that it will fail to even surpass Titanic’s global BO record.
    music to my ears.

  • KilliK

    so she is fat.

  • Orcus

    Fat would imply wobbly, ain’t nothing wobbly on her

  • Orcus

    Although it probably won’t make a dent, but TFA is still in the theaters, that and Titanic was rereleased in 2012 so that added to the numbers

  • KilliK

    well, then TFA can wait for its rerelease so it can surpass Titanic. until then it’s the third biggest movie of all time. third.

  • Orcus

    Unless you have a crystal ball that you holding out on the rest of us, time will tell. Still, impressive numbers within a 3 month or so span. What were the time frames for the top performing movies for them to reach their top spots? Just out of curiosity, did they pull their top numbers within a similar span?

  • KilliK

    you dont need a magical crystal ball. you just have to read the current BO performance and compare it to the other films for the same time period. right now, with the declining rate that TFA is making money, it will need a long time to surpass Titanic. it will be a surprise if it even reaches the one billion mark domestically.
    anyway. I and Turd were right about our predictions and that’s what matters. until the next movie, I see you.

  • KilliK

    Titanic was released almost 20 years ago and as result the inflation added to TFA’s numbers as well. so that goes both ways.

  • KilliK

    careful, her vagina will be so tight that it might break your dick.

  • Bop

    The strap-on stuff was too much. People who don’t read the comic gave me shit after seeing the movie. You read that comic? Is Deadpool gay?Etc.

  • Orcus

    Orcus will risk it

  • Orcus

    Where were these predictions posted?

    Also, do home video sales factor into these numbers or is it strictly Box Office numbers?

  • Bop

    I agree that the back and forth narrative killed its momentum.

  • KilliK

    AICN/Supernaughts. we are talking about movie BO here.

  • Kylo Ronin

    Yay.

  • Orcus

    Which thread?

    Wait, people still go to AICN??

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Knew it would happen. By the end of next month, everybody will have moved on to talking about Batman V Superman.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Just another blockbuster among many. Nothing special or stand-out about the new Star Wars movies, at all.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Re-releases count towards the totals; always have. They count for other movies, including the previous Star Wars episodes, so why should it be any different here? Yet a lot of SW fans want to shift the goalposts when circumstances aren’t in their favor.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Exactly. You have to pick a certain criteria to measure something by and then stick with it.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    I think Deadpool is supposed to be omnisexual or something. Seriously. That’s what his creators have said, and they’re considering giving him a boyfriend in the next movie. No joke.

  • Orcus

    Folks are still excited about a movie that came out in 1977 that it is now branching out into other series. Yep. Nothing special about it at all. 🙂

  • Orcus

    How are the goalposts being shifted if re releases add to the totals?

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    This was a fun movie that’s reinvigorated my interest in Fox’s X-Men “universe”, whether they follow up on that promise or not. With the rumors that Wolverine 3 and X-Force are going to be R rated, they just might. And, of course Deadpool 2/Deadpool and Cable, for which I will be very annoyed if they don’t cast Stephen Lang as Cable.

    Deadpool certainly wasn’t perfect – the villain was unremarkable and the plot was nonsensical and almost non-existent, although the movie gets away with the latter by poking fun at it – but it was hilarious at times and makes a lot of the MCU movies look extremely dull and safe by comparison. Roll on the next one.

  • Orcus

    Very true. If you adjusted for inflation, Gone with the Wind would probably be in the top 10, but you don’t see that mentioned in too many top gross lists unless you go out of your way to do the math

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Folks continue to be excited about LUCAS’S Star Wars and everything it fired in the imagination. That 1977 movie is the one that’s special and that has sustained interest for decades. No one is particularly interested in TFA itself, I’d wager.

    Time and again, I see people conflating the two, as if TFA has the right to piggyback on the monumental influence of the OT. It doesn’t. It has no right to reap that glory.

  • Orcus

    At what point in calculating the totals is inflation factored in? For the numbers that are reported for top grossing lists, are those straight numbers or adjusted numbers? Orcus was always about that

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    The numbers that are commonly reported are the unadjusted numbers. If you want to talk about inflation-adjusted numbers, that’s a different thing altogether – and it would not help TFA’s case.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    TFA is a better film than Titanic or Avatar. Box office is no barometer of quality.

  • Orcus

    It played out like an almost note perfect comic book flashback. But then again momentum in the printed medium plays out differently from the visual medium

  • Orcus

    The fact that it SW is still generating interest 39 years later is amazing.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    Indeed it is.

  • Orcus

    Inflation adjustments would not help a recent movie, but it would even the playing field for older movies. So what numbers should be taken as gospel? Unadjusted BO gross? Adjusted numbers? Tickets sold? This is no longer a TFA question, just a general question

  • Orcus

    The new movies are sadly not made primarily for the first gen SW fans though. Oh they include us, but they focus is on the younger gen of movie goers so it will build its foundation on those fans.

    Damn that kinda hurt Orcus to admit that 🙂

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Don’t feed the troll.

    Certainly, it’s true that Lucas’s Star Wars movies continue to inspire. TFA has nothing to do with that whatsoever. It’s a corporate branding exercise that jumped aboard a bandwagon of goodwill and nostalgia. It brought nothing to the table, and I think the majority would agree that it coasted shamelessly off the success of its progenitors even if they personally found it entertaining. Yet TFA’s most ardent fanboys try to sneak one through by blurring the distinction and claiming Lucas’s victories and accomplishments for its own, as if SW (the franchise/brand) was one unbroken line of movies based on a singular vision.

    The assertion that the awful TFA is better than even a standard Emmerich or Bay helmed blockbuster, much less a high quality one like Titanic and Avatar is, of course, laughable in the extreme.

  • Orcus

    Which troll, the internet is filled with them

  • Orcus

    Disney paid 4 billion for it, they want their money back

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    It’s true: they are chiefly being made for Millennials and the politically correct, not we older fans. And there has definitely been a generational shift as to what type of movies the younger generations enjoy and how these movies are constructed: superficial, glossy entertainment made for short attention spans and coasting heavily on hipster nostalgia.

    I say that without rancor; that’s just a reflection of the culture we live in these days, as movies are now only passing entertainment for youngsters. So don’t expect a rich, epic, ambitious space saga from the new movies.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Absolutely.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    The guy you replied to a few posts above. I won’t dignify him by specific acknowledgement. He utilizes dozens of sock puppet accounts and is despised on both this site and others.

  • Orcus

    Orcus did not realize, what other nyms does this individual go under?

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    I could give you quite a substantial list of suspects, but I can’t be bothered dignifying him and his nonsense and he doesn’t usually post on this site under those guises anyway. Ask Sagamanus and he’ll confirm it, if you’re interested.

  • Orcus

    Jeez, it sounds like we are gonna start chasing kids off our respective lawns. Except int the Underworld, where grass combusts

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    She’s nice and thick…ahem. ‘Phat’, not fat. Pity we didn’t get a glimpse of her tit when it popped out, although that was part of the joke, of course. A waste of a good R rating, if you ask me.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    As always, Creepy’s review has many moments of comedy gold, but it’s way too harsh and weirdly subjective. He decries the interaction between Deadpool and the mainstream X-Men characters, which is some of the best stuff in the movie, and then negatively compares the film to a “Chuck Morris movie from the eighties, distributed by Cannon and released on BetaMax”? Fuck, that’s a positive, in my book.

    Sometimes I don’t understand his opinions at all, although his manner of expressing them is always entertaining.

  • Sagamanus

    You’re the one who was waving it’s domestic total victory a while back. Now you say box office is nothing in the end? Ha.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    Absolutely. TFA is great.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    By the by: the correct usage is “its domestic total victory, ” not “it’s.” You will always be a moron.

  • Sagamanus

    Mother of god are you pathetic.

  • Sagamanus

    You don’t even get your own contradictions.

  • Sagamanus

    I am leaving that mistake unedited so a little mouse like you can wind yourself around in knots with your laughable superiority. Embarrassing.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    It’s not a contradiction at all. The simple point, moron, is that just because Titanic and Avatar made more money globally does not mean they are better films. Learn to think, you chowderhead.

  • Sagamanus

    Hence contradiction as you reveled in the domestic victory of SW as if it meant something.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Interesting that our retarded bete noire here claims “box office means nothing”, yet, if TFA had surpassed Titanic or Avatar for worldwide grosses, he’d be crowing it from the rooftops. Does he possess any kind of self-awareness at all?

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    Of course it’s significant. Star Wars remains as popular and resonant as ever.

  • Stalkeye

    IKR? WTF! Its a bit much pandering dontcha think?

  • Stalkeye

    From what’s been said, I heard that there are “straight” Men, taking it up the poop chute via strap on by their Girlfriends or Wives. X)

  • KilliK

    actually, a good reason for not being mentioned is that it had countless theatrical re-releases since its original premiere, because vhs/dvd/tv didnt exist at that time. movie theater was the only place you could rewatch the movie.

    so the comparison with GWTW is unfair and inconclusive because of its obvious advantage. this is not the case for most of the other movies.

  • KilliK

    someone mentioned that the studios prefer the Unadjusted BO gross because other parameters are factored in too (cost,market size, ticket price,etc), so this number gives a more straight and round comparison between the BO performance of the movies.

  • KilliK

    damn, they could at least CGI it if she was shy about it.

  • KilliK

    if you take it in the arse and you like it, you are not a straight man, no matter how you cut it. ask Creepy, he knows from personal experience.

  • KilliK

    have Cable as his boyfriend. I am sure the fans will love it.

  • Stalkeye

    Lol

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Creepy takes it up the arse from convict dick, not strap-ons.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Well, all men have a G-spot at their prostate, so I can understand that…ahem.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    I’m sure Creepy will, anyway.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    I thought there was an antecedent for it in the comics? There isn’t? (not that familiar with the Deadpool titles)

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    It does. All the other measures are fundamentally irrational. You can only truly compare movies based on the marketplace at the time.

  • Mr Nick Nightly

    “The Jerk” era Bernadette Peters. Goodness gracious, those heart-shaped glasses…

  • Bop

    Geeez, bro. TMI. 🙂

  • Bop

    Omnisexual. Now that sounds creepy.

  • KilliK
  • CoolHandJuke

    i was going more for the Heart Beeps version…

  • Toruk_Makto

    Holy shit…bottom lip action!

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Nice. I like the contrast between her image as a hard-ass, and her quite shy and humble personality in real life.

  • KilliK

    ditto. that’s what makes her so sexy.

  • CoolHandJuke

    Not enough I!

  • Kylo-Kenchun24

    Right on Stalkeye…way to give “MAXIMUM EFFORT!” for your thoughts on DP!

  • ErnestRister

    Disney’s having some issues. SW is a bright spot, but their stock is taking a bad hit because of ESPN and the China economy. I’d want to make my money back, too.

  • Orcus

    Orcus and the mate of Orcus threw a few bucks their way this morning with a matinee showing of TFA

  • ErnestRister

    I really want to see it again…No word on second run theaters at all yet people are swearing it’s coming out on April 5th on Blu-Ray and retailers are selling digital copy pre-orders with no release date, and only for the digital copy. Doesn’t seem to make any sense, unless you remmber how badly Disney botched up The Emperor’s New Groove. It was such a word of mouth hit, it was still making money in theaters even though Disney already announced the DVD releasee. The film came out on DVD when it was still making money. Not saying the same thing is happening now, just reminds me of 15 years ago.

  • Orcus

    This was a first run AMC theater with those leather reclining “cushy for the tushy” seats able to accommodate a spiked tail

    BTW, the Emperors New Groove still hold up well. Orcus watched it recently and it is still funny as hell

  • ErnestRister

    Mrs. Ernest is a big fan of The Emperor’s New Groove. The movie is a lot of fun, there’s nothing wrong with movies built to give audiences a whole lot of fun. Disney was disappointed with the first weekend numbers for ENG (if I remember right, and I’m probably wrong, it opened to something like $9 million), they announced the DVD release to save money on marketing, then sat dumbfounded as the thing achieved a ten times multiple because people had a blast and it became a sleeper hit.

    So I don’t know what’s going on with the Force Awakens home video releas, only that people are sayin’ a lot of things, the majority claiming April 5th.

  • Sagamanus

    I will be pointing that out as well in future arguments. That the only outlet they had back then was the theater. Very good point. Not to mention Titanic is a 3hr film as opposed to SW. Does that not mean less showings?

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    This from the malcontent who wrote “box office is no barometer of quality.”

  • Ollie

    You’re doing it wrong.

    Should’ve offered him chimichangas instead.

  • Stalkeye

    Stephen Lang or FTS!

  • Stalkeye

    ????

  • Stalkeye

    Same could be said about you Kchun!
    I hope to see more of your writing here.

  • KilliK

    well said, mate. TFA became the hit it was by literally copying and hinging on what Lucas had already created and achieved all these decades.

    But not only this truth is not acknowledged by many fans, there is also a disgracious attempt from both them and Disney to diminish Lucas’ contribution and importance and establish TFA as the momentous beginning of a new glorious era for the franchise.

    Last week, Disney released an official announcement celebrating TFA’s 900m domestic record. They used a word which stuck to me: “relaunch”, not continuation but relaunch. Which confirms what I had already feared and warned about since Disney bought Lucasfilm. That they were gonna soft reboot the whole thing, in the same manner they did for Star Trek.

    And this is exactly what they are doing and they are not coy about that. They are erasing the previous canonical expanded universe and they are replacing all the iconography and characters of the previous films with their own pale imitations. New Order instead of Galactic Empire, The Resistance instead Rebel Alliance, Starkiller instead of Death Star and all those inferior knockoff characters. Hell, they even destroyed Coruscant and nobody has realized that yet.

    And the fans not only they dont only have any problem with that, but they are welcoming it. I frequently read comments about how better and more badass Rey’s female character is than Leia, that Kylo is the best villain in the entire series, how progressive is to have a black stormtrooper and a heroine, how bold to kill one of your main characters and so on. A few days ago, there was even the news about a possible Poe and Finn love relationship in SW8 because it’s something many fans would like to see. And people were applauding Disney for daring to do something groundbreaking like that, if it happened to be the case.

    They are all acting as Lucas’ movies were made in the Dark Ages and here comes liberal Disney to bring the property to the 21st century and give the fans what they desire. While sacrificing the true spirit and identity of Star Wars.

    You know what will be the tragic outcome of all this: there will be a day, long after Lucas has passed away, the public, the pop culture, the general consensus, the fanbase, all these people will refer to Star Wars as Disney’s creations. Like what already is happening with the old fairy tales like Pinnochio, Snow White and even the more recent Frozen, where people are associating them with Disney’s movies while ignoring the existence of the original sources.

    Yes, Star Wars will live on forever, as Lucas wanted, but I am afraid his name will be forgotten as some point. and that’s fucking shame.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Excellent post. I don’t have much to add to it, except to say I agree with every word. You should copy and paste it on AICN every time there is a talkback about TFA there.

    Also had to laugh at the part about “liberal” Disney “saving” Star Wars from the clutches of the repressive Lucas. Disney has always been one of the most conservative entities in the entertainment industry, while Lucas was a genuinely progressive liberal who lived in the San Francisco Bay Area and filled his movies with all kinds of forward thinking tropes and themes. The propaganda in this case strikes me as similar to how Trump (and other Republicans) manipulate poor people to vote for them, against their best interests, in the US elections.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    And about your last paragraph: I think that’s inevitable. And it’s frightening. Big corporations absorb everything, given time. I fear that it may even happen to Marvel after Stan Lee passes. Lee, Kirby, Ditko and the like will be phased out as the characters’ original creators, and Disney will take the credit.

    Disney are going to own SW and Marvel for a hundred years; they will never relinquish their hold on them. And gullible and ignorant people will swallow whatever agenda they issue forth.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    Laughable in the extreme?

    Let’s examine the ending of Titanic for a second. No, we’re not going to discuss the glaringly obvious problem of there being enough room for Jack to lay next to Rose on the door (a fact which takes the viewer out of the ending entitrely and renders the emotion Cameron sought for the scene rather hollow). And we won’t mention the razor thin plot, the clunky dialogue, the sophmoric class warfare nonsense, or the silliness of Rose dropping a priceless diamond into the sea.

    As the camera pans over pictures of Rose living the full life Jack told her she would live, and we see Rose dying with a smile on her face, we are then treated to some sort of bastardized wedding on the Titanic sailing in heaven. Does Rose see her children? No. Her husband? No. Her grandchildren? No. How about the granddaughter on the salvage ship with Rose? No.

    She’s apparently going to spend eternity with a guy she knew for two days.

    Contrast that pablum with Rey reaching out to Luke with his father’s lightsaber, which is an invitation for him to embark on the hero’s jounrey yet again.

    Laughable? Not hardly.

  • Dee

    Thank god the dialogue in TFA wasn’t clunky at all. It’s great how Poe, new BFF of Finn, leaves him in the crashed Tie-Fighter in the desert to die. Leia, knowing what the dark side of the force can do to your character via her own dad, asks Han to “talk to the kid”, so he can run into his certain death. And how Luke abandoned everyone because he made one mistake. And the emotional impact of the meeting between Luke and Rey, who have never seen each other before. Good stuff.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    He left him to die? No. He most assuredly did not. Leia thought Han could reach their son. And he, plauged with guilt, tried to reach him. We don’t yet know exactly what happened with Luke, so it’s presumptuous to conclude he abandoned anyone. And, the emotion of that final scene comes from seeing Luke’s haunted visage, not from the meeting itself.

    What movie did you watch, exactly?

  • Dee

    A very sloppy one. None of these moments was in any way believably realized, neither emotionally, nor story-wise. And Poe left him to die. He disappeared after the Tie-Fighter crashed and did not bother to drag his new friend out. And Luke seems to be a major key figure in the battle, so yeah, he abandoned them.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    No, he did not. The impact of the crash threw him clear of the crash site. When he came to, Finn was gone. Did you even pay attention to this scene?

    Again, we don’t yet know the specifics of what happened to Luke.

    Your result-oriented reviews of TFA are naive and banal.

  • Dee

    Well, submit a review and enlighten us how this movie holds together.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    I’d be happy to. One issue I do have with it, which will likely be explained in the subsequent films, is why Leia didn’t call to Luke as he did to her at the end of Empire. Or why there was no indication that Luke sensed Han was in danger, as he did in Empire. It seems that Abrams and Kasdan missed an opportunity there.

  • Dee

    If you are serious about it, register here: http://thesupernaughts.com/wp-login.php?action=register
    and submit here: http://thesupernaughts.com/submissions/

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    Will do.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    How do I log in?

  • Dee

    You created the account? Here you can log in: http://thesupernaughts.com/wp-login.php

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    You mean the “glaringly obvious” fact that it’s not the room for two onboard the floating door that’s the problem, but the fact that Jack would freeze to death in the water while trying to secure lifejackets to its underside in order keep their combined weight afloat? A fact which is ably demonstrated in the movie when he attempts to climb on beside Rose and the door starts to sink into the water.

    As for the tripe about her death visions – take that up with religion and the intuitive, but illogical claims it makes about heaven. I’m sure a gullible buffoon such as yourself is a believer, anyway. The ending works on an intuitive level, germane to the story we just watched, and millions around the globe certainly didn’t find it hollow.

    Nice try with your latest plea for attention, Rachel. Now what do you say about all those glaring plot holes and deux ex machinas in The Force Awakens? Good luck defending the indefensible.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    This is going to be a laugh.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    If it “has to be explained in the subsequent films” after the fact, it’s a problem, dummy. I’m sure the Mary Sue’s uncanny abilities will be explained by later revealing she’s “the chosen one”, too. Haha.

    Kasdan and Abrams wrote a bad screenplay, and that’s all there is to it.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    “The impact of the crash threw him clear of the crash site.”

    Lol, really? That’s your excuse? And why didn’t he return to save Finn, then?

    I’m creasing up here.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Exactly. That’s what happens when you don’t craft a story organically, from the ground up, and instead cobble something together ass-backwards to meet a schedule, demanding the characters be where they have to be without any apparent underlying logic or consistency behind it. Not to mention constructing a film to score points with various politically correct groups instead of being true to the characters and the relationships established in the previous films (hence the girl hug, coming out of nowhere, between Leia and Rey).

    TFA is one of the worst screenplays ever to be written for a major blockbuster.

  • Dee

    Poe was supposed to be dead after the crash: http://www.slashfilm.com/the-force-awakens-death/
    They changed their mind and it’s noticeable.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Yep, completely cobbled together, as I thought. Cocknose has the storytelling sense of a turnip.Amazingly, in the face of all evidence, the writer of the article resorts to the usual apologist nonsense reserved for this terrible movie.

    And how far, exactly, could a crash throw Poe from the wreckage? Did it throw him halfway across the planet?! Without injury? And was he unconscious for days? And how did he escape the planet, especially with the First Order hunting him down? There’s problem after problem with it.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    Who the hell is Rachel? And, Kate Winslet herself has said there was enough room on the door. How desperate are you to trot out a buoyancy argument? James Cameron was good enough of a sport to go on Mythbusters where they proved him entirely wrong about the door sinking with both of them on it. Don’t take my word for it. Google it.

    The end of Titanic is emotionally manipulative bullshit. It fails on every level. There’s nothing intuitive about it. What’s intitutive is that if you believe in the afterlife, then the memories you’re going to take with you are those of the people you’re closest to – your children, your spouse, your grandchildren, etc. Rose lived to be almost 100 years old. She’s only going to take the memory of where her life began, and not the life she lived? It’s complete melodramatic horseshit.

    And, you should check Cameron’s declaration that he filed in an Avatar lawsuit. He admits to Pocahontas and Fern Gully being major influences on Avatar.

    http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/heat-vision/read-james-camerons-sworn-declaration-avatar-399979

    Finally, explain this Avatar plot hole, smart guy: why, after disobeying a direct order from the Colonel, is Trudy allowed to just wander the base freely, and free the others from jail?

    Or, why don’t the helicopters simply fly at a higher altitude than the native creatures and bomb them to hell? The movie takes place 150 years from now for goodness’s sake.

    Every movie, even the ones you defend to the death, has plot holes. Even The Empire Strikes Back has plot holes. For example, how long exactly did Luke train with Yoda before going to Bespin? Three days? He became that proficient in three days? This fact makes Rey’s surprise at her new found abilities a bit more plausible, does it not? After all, she’s likely the child of a Jedi. Goodness, Anakin was the only human who could drive a podracer. Where’d those abilities comes from? The Force. But because Lucas wrote that story, and not Abrams, it’s immune from criticism?

    But go ahead, Turd, thrill us all with your keen insight.

  • Stalkeye

    Boom goes the dynamite!! X)
    You have to be on the next Master Debators show!

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    Poe says it in the movie. When he came to, Finn was gone. Did you even watch this movie, or were you so busy scribbling notes to buttress you results-oriented, scatalogical screed that you missed it entirely?

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    “And, Kate Winslet herself has said there was enough room on the door.”

    Yes, there IS room on the door. Do you lack reading comprehension?

    Cameron already disproved Mythbusters’s “conclusion”, as they conveniently left out certain parameters necessary for their “solution”. Mythbusters was a once fairly rigorous show, but abandoned its principles and became increasingly less scientific and more sensationalist towards the end of its run.

    Cameron wins. He’s rigorous, logical, and scientifically exacting where the story demands it. You’re not going to get one by him. Cocknose, on the other hand, is an illiterate dummy who cobbles together his stories from the fevered recollections of Saturday morning cartoons he enjoyed as a child. Anything else, chief?

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    She is not a Mary Sue. That’s such an uninformed, misogynist reaction to this character.

    And, Anakin has no father in the Phantom Menace, but is the only human who can drive a podracer? How? Because he’s “unusually strong” with the Force.

    Luke is able to use the Force to destroy the Death Star after what, training with a remote in front of Obi-Wan for less than 5 minutes? But, he’s Anakin’s son, and even Vader says moments before he fires at Luke, that “the Force is strong with this one.”

    Why isn’t Rey being strong with the Force enough to explain Rey’s abilities when it is for Anakin and Luke?

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Yes, he explains it in two ambiguous lines that Cocknose likely handed to him a minute prior to shooting the scene. Pathetic.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    No. Cameron’s overarching point, and it’s a fair one, is that Jack had to die to serve the story. Pardon the pun, but Cameron’s all wet regarding the buoyancy of the door.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    She’s a Mary Sue. She makes no mistakes, instantly picks up skills, and is immediately liked and over-valued by everyone.

    Luke went through trials and tribulations on his journey, couldn’t do things at first attempt, struggled with his powers, and had to practice under Obi-Wan and Yoda’s tutelage. Big difference.

    Your argument (such as it is) comes from ignorance of what the term “Mary Sue” (or its male equivalent) actually means. It does not simply refer to a strong and capable character. The fact that you impugn Luke’s characterization and label it the same shows you to be a fool – and an apologist for indefensibly bad filmmaking.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    No. It’s just economical storytelling.

    The OT has its problems though. For example, why does Vader not even sense that Leia is his daughter in a New Hope. He actually puts his hand on her just before Alderann is destroyed. But yet, he can sense Luke’s thinking of Leia at the end of Jedi?

    Come on, Turd. Intellectual dishonesty is unbecoming.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    “No. It’s just economical storytelling.”

    Hahahaha. Thanks for the laughs, chief.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Sorry, chum – Cameron participated in a Reddit chat where he elaborated beyond that. And he’s right. So am I. You’re wrong.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    Makes no mistakes? She’s so competent that she gets captured by Kylo Ren.

    The male version is a Marty Sue. Luke has Marty Sue elements to him. It’s obvious.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    I’ve not seen that Reddit chat. The mythbusters episode is convincing. Cameron admitted as much.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    My pleasure.

    But, can you offer a cogent explanation for Vader having no clue that Leia is his child other than the obvious one: Lucas didn’t know then that Vader was Luke’s father, and didn’t decide until he was working on Jedi that Luke and Leia were to be siblings.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    Obi-Wan was supposed to live in A New Hope, but Lucas changed the script and decided to have him sacrifice himself. Is that cobbled together too?

  • Tarmac492.1

    Jack decided to stay in the frigid water because he knew that fucking that uppity high class bitch would be the highlight of his relationship with her. He went out on a high note and froze to death in the water, giving her a nice piece of guilt to carry around on her cheek like a slice of salami, sliced very thin.

  • KilliK

    hilarious how after so many years, there are still so many people who cant fucking understand what was clearly pointed out by the movie itself: the tragic couple was doomed to die from hypothermia and not drowning, if they both tried to stay on top of the floating board. Leo’s added weight would have forced it to float beneath the surface of the sea, soaking both with cold water. I mean, jesus, this is elementary physics.

    and you are right about Mythbusters, Turd, they used to be about the science but they ended up doing it only for the show . “Proving” Jim wrong, was their way to cater to their fans.

  • KilliK

    yeah, apparently the impact of the crash was powerful enough to send Poe far away from Finn’s vicinity, but not his jacket too.

    http://i.imgur.com/PHHue1t.jpg

  • KilliK

    fallacy, chief. you cant use the flaws of other movies to defend the flaws your movies. there is no perfect movie, but that doesnt mean that there arent bad and good movies. TFA is a bad movie in every fucking level.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    He wasn’t wearing the jacket when he crashed.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    My movies? Just because I enjoyed TFA and you didn’t, does not make it my movie.

    That there are enormous plot holes in the OT doesn’t mean that Lucas is an idiot. And, plot holes in TFA don’t mean Abrams and Kasdan are idiots either.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    Elementary physics? When you can explain Archimedes principle to us without having to google it, do let us know.

  • KilliK

    when the two Stooges are not only copying from the master, but they are also doing a horrible job with that, then yes, they are fucking idiots.

  • KilliK

    never said that he did. pay attention.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    Kasdan wrote Empire, Jedi, and Raiders. He is not an idiot.

    Abrams is worth $50 million dollars. He did a fine job in trying to accomplish the daunting task of following up ROTJ. He is not an idiot.

    He makes movies. You post rambling, angry taunts about them.

    TFA has a 93% fresh rating on Rotten Tomatoes. The consensus is you’re spectacularly wrong.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    Speaking of plot holes, why didn’t Vader know Leia was his daughter when he grabbed her in A New Hope?

  • KilliK

    wrong, Kasdan made a rewrite of a draft which was already written by another scripter who died before she finished it. and that draft was based on Lucas’ own ideas and guidelines. so get your facts straight, hose, before spouting such nonsense.

    JarJar may as well be worth $50b. the fact remains that he is a fucking horrible filmmakers.

  • Dennis O’Keefe

    That is not true at all. Kasdan completely rewrote Leigh Brackett’s script.

  • H. P. Lovecraft

    Bring on Cable and Domino

  • H. P. Lovecraft

    I enjoyed it. Nice to see Fox let someone be faithful to the comics. Wonder if some memos were sent to Singer or if it was too late for Mystique and Friends.

  • FACT!!!!!

    The male “prostate g-spot” is a myth

  • Stalkeye

    It would be nice to see a crossover from Singer’s X-Men universe and if so, I can imagine the fan service banter from DP. I’m so glad the unabashedly did this character justice and not cop out.

  • Stalkeye

    You forgot to say “FACT!!” fact.

  • FACT!!!!!

    I registered this username so I wouldn’t have to 😉