It’s Hammer time! Twins of Evil (1971) [NSFW] It’s Hammer time! Twins of Evil (1971) [NSFW]
A Classic British Horror Film involving a pair of twins-one good and the other..Evil! It’s Hammer time! Twins of Evil (1971) [NSFW]

 

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Welcome back to “It’s Hammer Time!”, where I pick a few of my favorite films from that Haunted House of Horror fondly known as Hammer Films. Here’s yet another recommendation-Twins of Evil (1971)!

Tagline:One Uses Her Beauty For Love! One Uses Her Lure For Blood! Which is the Virgin? Which is the Vampire?”

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What happens when a thrill seeker gets more than what she bargained for? Well, Hammer’s Twins of Evil has the answer! Loosely based on the vampire tale Carmilla   and part of Hammer’s Karnstein Trilogy (And often seen as the prequel despite its release after the previous Films: The Vampire Lovers and Lust for a Vampire),  Twins of Evil is set within nineteenth century middle-Europe, where orphaned teenage twins Maria and Frieda go to live with their uncle Gustav Weil, (Played by Hammer staple Peter Cushing) who heads the Brotherhood, a vigilante group trying to stamp out vampirism. Needless to say, their methods are way arbitrary and inappropriate which result is that of a frightened public.  However, the real threat lies with the local Count Karnstein, (Damien Thomas) and although the twins seem identical on the surface, Frieda finds herself much more drawn than her sister to the Count’s castle and soon, all hell breaks loose!

Twins of Evil is mostly known for its subtle Lesbian undertones and of course the titular protagonists played by real life Racy Twins; Mary and Madeleine Collinson who were in fact, Playboy Playmates.

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“Fill my eyes with that double vision-No disguise for that double vision”

 

During the start of the film, Gustav and the Brotherhood, performs a siege within female peasant’s home just when she was about to get it on with the Count. Karnstein mocks Weil and because of his “Diplomatic immunity” prevents him from being harmed by the brotherhood. Upon investigating a corpse with bite marks on his neck, the Puritan zealots apprehend an innocent woman nearby and under the allegations of Witchcraft as in that all too familiar tradition, she is burned to a stake!

“WTF! No Marshmallows”?

God is calling on us who believe in His holy word to stamp out that evil, to seek out the devil worshippers, and to purify their spirits so that they may find mercy at the seat of the Lord… by burning them!

While Maria is kind hearted with a sense of naivety, Frida is a total malicious bitch and if there is one thing they both have in common, is their disdain for Uncle Gustav and his austerity.

"If I catch any of you downloading my Movies, illegally.."!

“If I catch any of you bloody bastards downloading my movies illegally, so help me..”!

 

However in the case of “Boy crying Wolf”, his suspicions of the Local Count Karnstein are dead on. Especially since the arrogant and pompous satanic sadist “Karnie” has made a deal with the Devil (literally) in order to achieve immortality by murdering a girl as a human sacrifice, which calls forth his ancestor Countess Mircalla Karnstein to rise from her grave. As a debt of gratitude, Mircalla then turns the Count into a vampire. Frieda being rebellious and rather intrigued by the Count, meets up with him and becomes “converted” into a vampire herself and thus shit just got real!

I wold love to feast on those...! Oh, and what's on the table as well.

I wold love to feast on those…! Oh, and what’s on the table as well.

 

The village’s teacher, Anton, who is initially infatuated with the more mysterious Frieda, has studied what he calls “superstition”, and is convinced of the existence of vampires especially after his sister had fallen victim to one.  It’s interesting to note, how Anton called Gustav and the Brotherhood out for solely going after women whom they “suspect” for being witches, but not the Evil Count himself, due to his sovereign status.

 

The devil has sent me twins of evil!

 

Fellatio done wrong! This is what happens when Frieda doesn’t keep her Fangs in check!

 

Aside from scenes of Burnings, stabbings and decapitations, I don’t fully understand why this film was slapped with an R-Rating. There was no nudity (okay, with the exception of Frida’s breast shot) and even the burned-at-the-stake scenes were did not really justify ToE as a Film that really pushed boundaries as far as being explicit or exploitative but its more than what is usually seen from previous Hammer’s film library nonetheless.

There were at least two laughable examples of special effects photography especially one shown during the film’s intro that placed the flames into the foreground while the actresses tried to look as if she was being burned to a stake. C’mon Hammer, you can do better than that!

"Suckulent"!

“Suckulent”!

 

That being said, TOE gained more momentum during the final showdown between the Brotherhood and Karnstein and it’s a go for broke moment. I couldn’t help but laugh at how the Count’s mute an servant, Joachim, was left behind to fend off the Brotherhood while the Count makes an escape attempt (how typical!!). And as much as I like ToE, it’s not immune from two unintentionally comedic scenes. Aside from the burning stake intro, I found Joachim to be somewhat of a racist caricature.

Here you have this hulking black servant who is mute, yet his only method of communication is making Ape-like sounds (Laughing My MotherFucking Ass Off while shaking my head). There’s that scene in which he warns the Count that felt something out of a Mel Brooks horror spoof.

LOL I just can’t.

Cushing’s performance is somewhat exaggerated but very adept as the dogmatist puritan prick Gustav Weil, while David Warbeck (The Beyond) transition from mild mannered Teacher to heroic Vampire Slayer but its Madeline Coulson, who really brought it as the Villainess Frieda who despite her threats and mistreatment of her Twin Sister Maria, she emotes a sign of concern for her sister out of fear that her vampire urges may take hold of her and in doing so may bite Maria’s neck.

 

Sibling rivalry gets a new meaning here!

“Does Frieda have to choke a Bitch”?

 

During the beginning and end of the film, I found myself laughing at Harry Robertson’s theatrical intro theme which sounds akin to a fucking Saturday morning superhero cartoon. (I’m talking Justice League shit here!) Aside from a few gripes, ToE is another buried treasure within the hallowed halls of Hammer. I really enjoyed this arguably superior Film of the Karnstein Trilogy and highly recommend you check it out just for Cushing’s performance alone, and of course…..

*Sighs* If only..

*Sighs*

 

Stalks, out!

 

Cosmetology gone wrong! This is what happens when the vain Count paid a visit to Joan Rivers' Plastic surgeon.

Cosmetology gone wrong! This is what happens when the vain Count paid a visit to Joan Rivers’ Plastic surgeon.

 

Twins of Evil is available now on YouTube or, you can always purchase the damn Blu-ray.

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Stalkeye

Writer, Satirist, Gamer, Artist and Pop Culture commentator- Stalks offers his outspoken views on most things Geek related as well as WTF is wrong with the world today!

  • Hey, cool.

  • “Subtle” lesbian undertones?

  • Gotta love them 70’s

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Nice write-up on a great lesbian fuck-fest.

    Female vampires are damn sexy. I hope Peter Cushing did his duty on behalf of his fellow man and had a threesome with those twins backstage.

  • KilliK

    twin playmates? mama! slurp,slurp,chomp,chomp,smooch,smooch,mama.

  • KilliK

    he showed them that his “space station” is fully operational.

  • Bop

    Current women of Hollywood have nothing on those classic beauties you showed here, Stalks.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Did the twins tell him “You may fire when ready?”

  • S_D_M_F

    I love these Hammer articles, Stalks.

  • Great work, Stalks. God, that video of the servant made me cringe but dammit if I did not laugh a little, lol.
    They introduced more sexy elements in the 70s when Hammer was running risk to look too old-fashioned.

  • Stalkeye

    Compared to other films of this ilk, oh, yes!

    To be continued….*Wink*

  • Phantomcreeps

    Fuck you.

  • Stalkeye

    No, but your Momma will do.

  • Stalkeye

    (;’

  • Bop

    I bet Cushing did a better job than Lynch in Mulholland Drive.

  • Stalkeye

    Thanks, SDMF. Long time no see, Bruh.

  • Stalkeye

    Thanks, Brotha. And yes, you are correct!
    Time is a cruel Bitch, indeed.

  • Stalkeye

    I think he would be too upset over the loss of his Wife (at the time) to indulge in such tasty treats. /:

  • Stalkeye

    Thanks for this and other things Dee, you are indeed doing the Lord’s work!
    I may invest in the Blu-ray once the price drops further down.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Yeah, Cushing was too much of a gentleman to get up to any shenanigans.

  • S_D_M_F

    Oh, I been around…. heh heh. I’ve just been quiet.

  • Stalkeye

    So, what’s the chance of StudioHEAD© doing a TOE remake starring those infamous Olsen Twins?

    http://blondhairdontcaredotcom.files.wordpress.com/2013/02/beachmint.jpg