Go, go, Godzilla! The Big G turned 61! Go, go, Godzilla! The Big G turned 61!
This week it has been 61 years since the first Godzilla- movie has been released. A welcome opportunity to pay homage to the greatest... Go, go, Godzilla! The Big G turned 61!

On November 3, 1954, Godzilla was released in Japan. The movie, not the monster. Or was it both? Means, “The Big G” turned 61 this week. Reason enough for four fans and writers of The Supernaughts to celebrate our favourite movie monster from Japan with an overdue homage.

Godzilla may have stomped Tokyo, but he never trampled on our feelings.

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Godzilla: The anarchic kid in all of us

by Dr. Newton Geiszler

Alright, Let’s see here…..why am I still a fan of the Big G long after I should have outgrown such things? It might have to do with my still lingering fascination with primeval, gargantuan beings that lorded over our furry, scampering ancestors. Maybe it is the shame and tragedy I feel when I look at pictures of Lucky Dragon No. 5, Hiroshima, and Nagasaki. Real life horrors that stay in the minds of artists who transpose them on the big screen, to make sense of humanity’s unfortunate penchant for inhuman acts.

Or could it be the fact that for as wild and vicious as he is, the Big G is also a lonely outcast, condemned by the world at large, which is how some of us feel at times. Kids are clumsy, noisy, and irritable so it shouldn’t come as a surprise that they would relate to Godzilla, who embodies all of those things in a bombastic manner. Maybe it’s the dedication to practical FX, set design, and pyrotechnics and the effort put into them, which is something that is criminally overlooked. And lastly, is it just the fact that a stuntman gets paid to do what we as kids used to do, putting on a costume and smashing model cities as our parents tore their hair out while they look upon the mess we made, and do it with reckless abandon and glee?

Perhaps all of those things are why I’m still a fan. Here’s to sixty more years of Godzilla.

gidorah

One Godzilla to Rule All Monsters

by AsimovLives

On November 3rd 1954, a huge strange creature emerged from the bottom of the seas, and cinema was never the same again. It was called Gojira, anglicized to Godzilla for the western audiences.

I consider myself a new arrival to Godzilla. My first contact was through a rather bad animation children series that was a sort of version of Scooby-Doo but with the big lizard as the teens’ group animal/monster companion, plagued by the presence of that soul-sucking type of character known as the odious comedy relief in the form of a pink baby Godzilla-like creature.

The other way of know of Godzilla was through what’s called “Cultural Osmosis”, when one knows of a given character or film or TV series not because you watch them but because you are aware thanks to references and all other indirect exposure. Suffice to say, often times this cultural memes are based on the campier, goofier and more simplified and “Disneyfied” versions, of which in the case of Godzilla meant all those silly monster smack-down movies where people in obvious monsters suits stomped all over model buildings of Tokyo. They did not project a much edifying vision of the Big G for me. I am not and never was a fan of camp, and that was the image that the Godzilla franchise has on the public consciousness.

Then it all changed when a new chapter in the Godzilla saga started when in the mid-2000s for the first time the original version of the 1954’s Godzilla film was shown in the West. Until then, Godzilla was known to western audiences through the American re-edit of the film. To avoid confusion, this version was presented under its original Japanese title – Gojira. My interest about it would had still been marginal if not for a glowing review I read in “Do You Call Yourself A Scientist?”, a film review website hosted by Elizabeth “Liz” A. Kingsley, an Australian biochemist who moonlights as an internet reviewer of horror/science fiction films. If first it had caught my curiosity, now it caught my interest.

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I’m not sure what truly made me buy the UK Special Edition- DVD that contained both versions of the film and numerous other extras like an audio commentary and making off documentaries about the movie, the filmmakers and the franchise itself, as it certainly was more expensive than the vanilla DVD. Receiving the DVD by mail, I promptly watched the original version. And I was blown away!

Liz’ review was right about everything: This was no silly monster movie, but instead a serious film with a serious theme, made by people who took their job, their film and their audiences seriously. I saw a truly great movie. As such, I didn’t even bother to watch the American version. I’m certain some people vouch for it as a proper good movie in its own right and I have no reasons to doubt that, but me I rather have that great movie I know as Gojira unspoiled.

The distance of time might make us overlook just how revolutionary it was at the time it was first released. Hard to believe as it might be, but Gojira was the first Japanese movie that directly addressed the nuclear bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, until then treated as a taboo subject, and not just as the obvious metaphor or in the imagery of the damaged Tokyo or the images of the wounded but as a direct mention in a line of dialogue said in a matter of fact. The atomic bombings and two other nuclear related accidents – the accidental irradiation of the crew of the fishing vessel “Daigo Fukuryū Maru” during the “Castle Bravo” atoll nuclear test and irradiation of fishing from other nuclear tests – caused dozens of deaths through radiation poisoning and sickness and made Japan a country particularly conscious regarding to the dangers of nuclear technology.

In Gojira the focus is, funny enough, not on the monster itself, but something the film treats as perhaps an even greater danger: the misuse of weapons of mass destruction, represented by the creation of the film’s true protagonist: the tormented scientist Dr. Serizawa. The monster itself exists to create the moral dilemma that the film presents and which never shies to present all sides as equally valid. So it is less a monster-smashing-things-up-movie but a sophisticated movie about the possible dangers of nature and human agency equally.

I’m a fan of Gojira. I have no doubts this is a great movie. As a film and a SF fan, I can’t hide that I have some curiosity for the development of the Godzilla- franchise. But the thing is, I’m aware that the original movie sits alone in the serious treatment it gave the subject and the monster itself. Godzilla evolved from an impersonal force of nature to a villain to an anti-villain to an anti-hero to finally a hero that could play lead to movies and TV shows made for children. The latter is what’s mostly on the public consciousness.
Yet, it’s important to point out that in recent years there has been a reversal trajectory to Godzilla, baby steps being made to push it away from the hero of silly monster movies and back to the more ambiguous earlier versions of the Big G. This culminated in the 2014 film Godzilla directed by Gareth Edwards. I have reviewed this movie before, and in it I couldn’t disguise my enjoyment and respect I have for it. As far as I know, this is of all the Godzilla movies made that is closest to the original Gojira. Gojira and Godzilla (2014) are the type of monster films I enjoy the most, the ones that take themselves seriously. They know they are movies about impossible creatures wrecking destruction, but that doesn’t mean they have to cheapen themselves with self-irony or basking on an audience’s appetite for entertainment cheesiness. They are films that are films. I like that type of dedication; I connect and identify with that attitude.

I don’t presume to be a big fan of Godzilla, but I know what I like and in this franchise I found two very good movies I enjoyed a lot and who I enjoy revisiting as much as when I watched them for the first time. For that I’m glad Godzilla exists. Cinema would be so much poorer if the Big G had not emerged from the bottom of the sea to stomp viewers to submission.

As always, thank you for reading.

AsimovLives.

King-Kong-versus-Godzilla-570x320

Godzilla: When we were young

by Tarmac 492

Godzilla reminds me of the simple joys of being young. Godzilla is a hot open turkey sandwich on a cool November Day. Growing up in New York, WWOR (Channel 9 from the very hip and cosmopolitan Secaucus, New Jersey) would play three Godzilla– flicks back to back on the day after Thanksgiving. Those were always wondrous fucking days.
My mother would prop me up in front of the television and feed me leftovers from Thanksgiving Dinner. For the next six hours, I would marvel at the sights of Godzilla throwing down with the psychedelic Smog Monster, some giant bug from beneath the sea, or his robotic Doppelgänger—the frightening Mecha-Godzilla.

Fuck all the critics that said the special effects were cheesy. Look again motherfuckers. I will put that man in a rubber suit chomping down on model trains over the CGI effects in many of today’s blockbusters. I just wrote it, so you better believe I mean it.
Godzilla’s roar is cooler than anything in Bay’s Transformers flicks. It’s easy to bash on Bay, but every parent should deny their child access to the hideous Transformers flicks until they have seen Monster Zero or Godzilla vs. The Thing. I am not a parent, but it is just my sticky two cents that I just pried off the bar.

Listening to Akira Ifukube’s music as Godzilla stared down the barrels of a thousand tanks made me feel like I could take on any schoolyard bully, or smack a ringing double off that pitcher in little league that already had a moustache at age ten. There has yet to be a Marvel film that has approximated that feeling for me. Maybe that is because of my age. Perhaps many of the films today—constructed by marketing majors who pray to buzz words and trends—lack the soul necessary to inspire us?
Aren’t these the things that Superheroes are supposed to do?

Godzilla-with-Umbrella-Realing-on-the-Set

Ch-ch-changes: Godzilla never stops mutating

by Dee

My first encounter with Godzilla took place many years ago when Godzilla 1985 was aired on afternoon TV. I instantly became a fan of the big lizard. One could say Godzilla, Chinese Ghost Story and Jackie Chan were the trifecta responsible for igniting my interest for Asian movies.

Godzilla 1985 was kind of a (comparatively) hard-edged reboot of the whole Godzilla-series, a callback to the dark beginnings of the monster saga, before the franchise had become more and more kid-friendly in the late 60s, which led to a decade-long hiatus in the mid 70s, due to creative exhaustion.

It’s funny how many baffling parallels a comparison of the history of the Godzi-franchise with that of the James Bond-movies reveals: Both started out as a rather serious, dramatic film series, became more fantastic and outlandish over the time however and finally entered the realm of total camp in the 1970s. You could say that the aggressive, animalistic version of the early Inoshiro Honda films is the Sean Connery among the Kaijus, while the cutesy, clowning variety of the later films by Jun Fukuda is their Roger Moore. And the analogy to 007 still works for the later movies: Godzilla 1985’s gritty return to the roots was akin to the Timothy Dalton outings of the late 80s and the Godzilla movies of the 90s showed the same mix of drama and escapism as Pierce Brosnan’s run.

jetjaguar

This development is also displayed in the visual appearance of our favourite Japanese monster: A vaguely authentic dinosaur- design gradually morphed into a more anthropomorphic yet cartoony look, including big pop eyes and a silly long rubber neck. But with the rewon grit of the reboot, Godzilla’s original, sinister look also made a return, remodeled and revamped for the tastes of the 80s audience of course. The circle was complete.

One theory says the changes reflect how Japan gradually embraced the past, incorporated the atom bomb trauma into its pop culture as a way to overcome it. It’s surely also just a sign of the always fluctuating pop culture to which even a staunch individualist like Godzi had to adapt to to survive.
Not only the movies’ tone and look was constantly changing though, like any horror movie icon, the Big G went from foe to victim to friend, only to go back again, an ambiguous role endlessly mutating like its nuclear-powered protagonist. An easy -and more likely- explanation for this would be that the film makers had to shake up the formula once in awhile to keep things interesting, but I like to tell myself that it’s a proof for Godzilla’s steadfast moral codex that does not bow to any pressure from society. He, only he decides if he wants to help or destroy. It’s Godzilla’s way or the highway- unless he already trampled on it.

If you asked me which version of G I like the most, I could not decide. The bringer of death, the campy jokester or the overwhelmed father (or mother?)- I love them all. Even the low points of the franchise still had their entertainment value. Like when Godzilla fought something that basically looked like a giant cleaning rag with eyes (Godzilla vs. the Smog Monster, 1972). Or Godzilla vs. Megalon (1973) with the subterranean country of “Seatopia” and the infamous “Jet Jaguar” song. How can one not impressed and enamoured by such a variety?

godzilla_vs_smog

There are only two entries that are truly hard to enjoy, one being the universally loathed Godzilla’s Revenge (1969), a lousy effort with a shamelessly misleading title, featuring a plot that has Minya, Godzi’s controversially received son, shrunk to human size and suddenly equipped with the ability to speak, befriending a schoolboy so they can together learn to face their bullies. Some stock material of monster fights from preceding movies are shoved in to justify the title. Ugh, good intentions gone all wrong.

That. Voice.

Unsurprisingly, Emmerich’s interpretation from 1998 is the second one I cannot recommend to anyone, a movie that is not able to give its titular creature any identity. Although I will always defend the unfairly maligned 2014- version by Gareth Edwards, who understood how to simultaneously pay homage to the original and to use new FX to present us majestic imagery that was impossible to realize before due to the technical limitations of the time.

Godzilla will star in a Japanese production next year and in a sequel to Edwards’ film in 2018. Like Cher and David Bowie, Godzilla will be constantly changing, but he will never stop returning.

*Note: I referred to Godzilla as “He” throughout my whole contribution. I know there is some debate about his gender, I personally always interpreted him as a male character.

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Godzilla, Rock On!

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Author Image

DetectiveDee

Detective Dee reviews movies and sometimes TV-series. He likes to indulge in the Asian cinema, exploitation flicks and the horror genre but is no stranger to Blockbuster culture either. He writes whatever he wants, but always aims to entertain.

  • Tarmac492.1

    Great stuff!!! Thanks for letting me play!! I love the original Godzilla. Love the stark black and white and somber tone. I think my faves are the Ghidrah flicks from the sixties. Love that shit. And Smoggy also holds a special place in my heart.

  • Tarmac492.1

    I did not like Minya. I do, however, like Enya!!!

  • CoolHandJuke

    Godzilla’s Revenge be hilarious, yo…

  • Toruk_Makto

    I remember playing with that Godzilla toy where the hand could shoot off. How wonderfully irresponsible toy makers were back then as my target was usually my little brothers forehead…zapowy!

  • Tarmac492.1

    Had that too!! great toy!!! Also loved the battlestar galactica toy that shot out the fighters and they gave u cylon cardboard targets

  • Zed

    Memory is hazy, but I think my first exposure to Godzilla was the crossover with Mothra. You know, back when the shared universe thing actually worked.

  • Enya rules!

  • I’d like to congratulate my fellow co-authors of this article for their insights and interesting opinions. Partnership rules!

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    It’s nice to find somebody else prepared to defend the Edwards movie, as I thought I was the only one! Yes, it has its flaws, but many good aspects also.

  • KilliK

    zzzzz…

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Someone doesn’t agree with you? Tough shit!

  • KilliK

    no, it’s the mention of Edward’s Godzzzila, it’s like taking a sleeping pill when I hear it.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    I dread to think what his Star Wars movie is going to do to you, then. Don’t operate heavy machinery while watching it!

  • KilliK

    maybe he ll do a good job with his SW, it cant be any worse than TFA.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    True. You can’t get much lower than JJ.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Wait a minute: isn’t “Godzilla’s Revenge” supposed to be a metaphorical story? Minya cannot actually speak, nor is he even the “real” Minya; he’s just the boy’s imaginary friend (inspired by the Godzilla/monster legends of the in-movie universe) to help him gain the courage to stand up to the bullies.

    That’s not a bad spin on the formula, misleading (and inappropriate) title or not. In a long running, formulaic series I don’t have a problem with the variety provided by little side trips or oddities like that. It’s like trashing Halloween 3 just because it defies what we expect of the brand name, due to the fact that it didn’t feature Michael Myers or a slasher plot.

  • Yeah it’s a daydream. It’s still a tough watch.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Reminds me of the PSAs at the end of eighties cartoons.

    Life lessons!

  • Dr. Geiszler, Kaijuologist

    The one unique thing, and this damning it with faint praise, about the movie was a snapshot of latchkey kid’s like in 60’s Japan.

  • Dr. Geiszler, Kaijuologist

    Wish TNT would run Godzilla marathons again. But they’re too high brow these days, apparently………

  • Had to look up “latchkey kid”, that was new to me.

  • Dr. Geiszler, Kaijuologist

    I wonder if it’s still a thing in Japan.

  • Dr. Geiszler, Kaijuologist

    And then the ending to Godzilla’s Revenge, if you interpret it differently, it’s kind of a downer.

  • That nothing really happened?

  • Dr. Geiszler, Kaijuologist

    That he gave in to peer pressure and is now a bully himself.

  • Ha. True. I only saw that movie once.

  • Not sure if I will revisit it. Life’s too short.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Me, too.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    So it’s a proto-Spielberg movie filtered through Japanese social history? Seems there’s more to it than meets the eye.

  • Dr. Geiszler, Kaijuologist

    That would be giving it way too much credit.

  • Dr. Geiszler, Kaijuologist

    Kinda wish it was now. Dammit.

  • Have you seen that damn movie?

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    😉 You made it sound like ET or Empire of the Sun…those were also about latchkey kids. Divorced parents, suburban adults too busy to spend time with their children, empty middle-class houses…kids retreat into fantasy world of their own making.

  • Dr. Geiszler, Kaijuologist

    ET yeah, but Empire of the Son is a whole nother can of worms there.

  • Dr. Geiszler, Kaijuologist

    *Sun

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Well, Godzilla was a a metaphor for the atomic bomb, so the series is no stranger to skewed fantasy interpretations of WW2 imagery, a bit like the kid’s POV in that movie.

  • Dr. Geiszler, Kaijuologist

    True.

  • KilliK

    and where is your piece? again, everyone else wrote something about Big G, except you. dont be lazy.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Eh? Did I say I was writing a piece about Godzilla or, indeed, anything else?

    Sorry, but I don’t have time to write articles at the moment. If I write something again in the future, it’ll be for my own enjoyment, not because someone demands me to do it. None of us are getting paid for this.

    Come on, mate; don’t be rude.

  • KilliK

    better rude than lazy.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Ah, so you’re just going to persist in being rude.

    Where are your articles, you slothful devil?

  • KilliK

    fallacy.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    No, it isn’t. Look the word up in a dictionary.

  • KilliK

    I just did and it is.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    A fallacy is using invalid reasoning to construct an argument. Am I trying to disprove my perceived “laziness” in your eyes by asking you that question? No – I am simply asking you the question. I couldn’t care less if you think I’m lazy or not.

    You’ve hounded me, Asimov and others for reviews and articles in the past, as if we were obligated to provide them for you, yet you’ve never posted a single one of your own. It seems a strange and entitled thing that you think we must provide entertainment for you, gratis, yet you don’t even contribute yourself.

    Sorry, but I’m not here to satisfy your demands. And that’s my final word on the matter.

  • Captain Genius

    always leave a place the way you found it. for some reason, that one always stuck with me

  • KilliK

    preach it, mate.

  • Captain Genius

    here’s a story I’m embarassed to tell. as a little boy my mom would always yell at me if a giant monster film was on tv, not that i had ever asked her to, but like most little kids i loved dinosaurs as a toddler and giant monsters are the next step up. one saturday afternoon, i was perhaps 5, playing with my legos watching a godzilla film on tv, my mom is reading the paper and she asks me if i wanted to leave right now and go see godzilla fight mechagodzilla on the big screen. i said no because he was fighting him on tv. so i stayed home and watched him on tv, not knowing it was the sequel that was playing at my mall.

    derp

  • Captain Genius

    nice articles guys

  • Captain Genius

    i’ll defend the fuck out of that movie

  • Stalkeye

    Great tribute, Gentlemen! When one thinks of Giant Monster Movies, one name often comes to mind and that’s..

    http://img4.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20140419182017/godzilla/images/d/d2/Godzilla_2014_Photo_Magnet_King_of_the_Monsters_2.jpg

  • Stalkeye

    That’s what Torrents are for, I guess. Also, there’s subscription services such as Netflix and HULU.

  • Stalkeye

    What’s so sad about Filmation’s MOTU cartoons is that they were too kid Friendly and abstained from any violence whatsoever. How could you fight Monsters, robots and evil Sorcerers without Kicking Ass???

    Instead, we get a few lackluster trippy PSAs like “Tell your friend that you love him”. WUT?!? But I also have to give props for their messages about accepting others who may be different from you or anti-bullying.

  • Flaws? What flaws?

  • Can’t be worst then JJ’s, can it?

  • You and me both.

  • One Godzilla to rule all monsters

  • Stalkeye

    <—–Team Gamera!!

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Impossible!

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Perhaps numerous touring rock bands over the years should have heeded that advice. It would have prevented a hell of a lot of hotel rooms from being trashed.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Yeah, I recall that He-Man was forbidden from using his sword to attack enemies. Or that’s the rumor, at least, since he rarely did so. What a great big mangina he was. Still, I loved that cartoon regardless.

  • Stalkeye

    <—–TEAM G.I.JOE!

  • Dr. Geiszler, Kaijuologist

    Not the same.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    The flaws are in some of the performances and the script, not Edwards’s direction or visual sense, which are very accomplished.

    Aaron Taylor Johnson isn’t an awful lead, but he’s not very emotionally compelling as an actor, either. I do appreciate that he played a military guy as a no-frills man of duty, and not as a rah-rah Michael Bay redneck asshole caricature, though. I’ll defend the character and his performance on that level.

  • Me, I saw no problems in the performances and script. I liked everything about that movie. That movie was like a godsend, like a lesson to all other filmmakers on how to make a monster movie in all regards.

  • Bop

    Woa, a quadruple team. Kudos people. The big G is here to stay.

  • Bop

    He, he. The katakana says Gojira.

  • Sagamanus

    Fantastic work guys. I loved the new one as well. And finding fault with every cgi creation in an age of cgi is absurd. One might love practical effects and the nostalgia around them, but you’re going to have to come to terms with where we are. There is no going back.

  • S_D_M_F

    That’s actually discussed and explained on the Criterion commentary. 🙂

  • S_D_M_F

    Go team Thundarr!!

  • Stalkeye

    Thundarr>>>>>>>>>>>He-Man

  • Tarmac492.1

    Something special about seeing flicks like this on the tv. Especially late at night.

  • KilliK

    looks like a hit a nerve there. well:

    1.some time ago, Asimov asked for suggestions for his new tribute article which he wanted to write. since then, I asked him ONCE regarding the progress of his article. if that’s hounding, then you need to “look the word up in a dictionary”. and what “others”?

    2.last time there was an article like this one co-written by a group of people, you expressed your interest to participate in one of those for the next time, if it was about a subject you liked. your desire was supported by a few us who want to read your writings. one of the mods told you he would come in contact with you when there was gonna be a new article.

    so when this Godzilla was posted, and you are a fan of G, and you already wrote quite a few paragraphs in the comments, I was just surprised why didnt take the opportunity to take part in this article. I dont expect you to write a whole essay, a few paragraphs, not longer than those you already posted in the comments. My “stop being lazy” remark was not mean spirited, I said it in the context of “come on, you keep talking about wanting to write something for the site, you had the chance but you still didnt do it”. I was expressing a bit of frustration by teasing you.
    Now if you take all the above as me “demanding” and you were insulted, well, you are simply and completely wrong and your reaction was exaggerating.

    that’s all.

    3. I know what a fallacy is. But I wanted to see where our squabble would go.

    4.peace.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    You didn’t “hit a nerve.” I just don’t tolerate accusatory bullshit – and completely random bullshit, coming out of nowhere, at that.

    1. “What others?”

    Creepy. And, yes, you insulted Asimov once, quite aggressively, for being a “lazy bastard” for not writing stuff, as you did me. Neither was signposted as a joke.

    2. ” I was just surprised why you didn’t take the opportunity to take part in this article.”

    No one told me about it. I’m not signed up to their email group, or however the guys here alert each other about future plans for articles.

    And who says I would have had anything to say about Godzilla at length anyway, beyond the few short comments I already posted? That goes for any other subject. I wouldn’t write a piece about, say, Star Trek, because even though I enjoy the movies and some of the series, I’m not a Trekkie and certainly no expert. There are more informed people here than me who can talk about such things.

    3. Glad to satisfy your curiosity.

    4. Amen.

    Anyway, here’s the deal about me and articles. I never planned to write any in the first place. I briefly got into that field, entirely by accident, because I wrote a long review of Age of Ultron. But that particular piece was never, ever supposed to be posted here. I just decided to write it for my own amusement and post it in the comments of AICN to see what kind of reaction it would get. Then I was encouraged to submit it here. It was already written, so what the hell.

    Due to the good responses I received from that review, people started requesting me to write more, which for some time I’ve considered and, on a few occasions, even been tempted. But I never made any hard promises, because I don’t like disappointing people and writing long articles can also become a fun, but ultimately useless sink-hole eating up a person’s time, especially if it’s not a paid gig. I knew if I continued to write material, it would lead to expectations which I might not be able to fulfill.

    In any case, I already feel I waste far more time posting off-the-cuff comments on sites than doing other things, never mind full blown articles that have to be drafted and researched. That feels too much like work, whereas comments are more spontaneous and casual. If other people enjoy writing reviews and things on a regular basis, more power to them. I’m only here for fun and some entertainment, not to meet deadlines and be forced to deliver things. I can get that at work.

  • Stalkeye

    “Anyway, here’s the deal about me and articles. I never planned to write any in the first place. I briefly got into that field, entirely by accident, because I wrote a long review of Age of Ultron. But that particular piece was never, ever supposed to be posted here. I just decided to write it for my own amusement and post it in the comments of AICN to see what kind of reaction it would get. Then I was encouraged to submit it here. It was already written, so what the hell.”

    That part is definitely true. I remember one of the naughts encouraging you to post a AoU review and many of us wanted more articles from ya, but we can understand if you can’t commit. Glad to have you as a regular visitor and needless to say, you know your Shit.
    As for you going back n forth with Killik, I guess it more than proves that you and him are not the same person. (;’

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    Thanks, man. Appreciate the support. 🙂

    And yes, I’d have to be a very fucked up, schizophrenic person indeed to be having a long, in-depth argument with myself. That’d be a trolling feat on par with Andy Kaufman or something!

  • Stalkeye

    LMMFAO

  • KilliK

    I thought that was your final word on the matter? 😉

    1.Creepy? LOL. Creepy breaths for posting articles and expressing his opinion, asking him when he is gonna write a new one is like giving him a blowjob. The guy loves writing and I cant believe he gets frustrated whenever we ask him for new articles. and I am not the only one who is asking him, you have, others have, but I guess asking is equivalent to demanding. also you said others, not other, so who are the rest besides Creepy?

    2. then in this case I apologize, I took for granted that you were informed about this article and you didnt bother to participate despite your previous comments in the previous tribute article which I talked about. I am sorry.

    as for the rest, I understand what you say but at least you could write one or two paragraphs in those tribute articles, I dont think it will be more trouble than already writing lengthy comments in the same article. anyway. do as you wish, but please, dont chastise people for simply wanting to read articles from you.

    3.peace out.

  • KilliK

    only fucking idiots would believe that Turd and I are the same person.

  • Tarmac492.1

    It would be kind of brilliant. Almost like Tim Robbins in Shawshank, or Norton/Pitt Fight Club. I wonder if someone could use Discus profiles as an alibi or something?

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    1. Still not getting it, I see. At least have the good grace to admit you were in the wrong and be done with it, instead of trying to defend your mistake with self-righteous justification.

    You didn’t put an emoticon in those initial comments to me and you know full well you didn’t (you altered a comment later to soften the blow, as you knew you’d gone too far. Don’t think I didn’t notice). They weren’t in the spirit of your usual ones, where I can usually detect their tongue-in-cheek or humorous nature, and you should know by now that I’m not easily offended so it must have been in poor taste. So it’s certainly not on me “how I take it”.

    If I directly called a person a” fucking cunt”, is the recipient entirely at fault for taking it the wrong way or taking the insult at face value? “Oh, it doesn’t matter what I say to people, it’s only their fault for taking it the wrong way; I abdicate responsibility.” Come on, be sensible.

    And, yeah, I’ve suggested ideas to Creepy, Asimov, Tarmac, Stalkeye and the like from time to time myself; I’ve never chided them for not delivering and called them lazy into the bargain. They can do them if they wish, or do something else, and I’ll be happy to read whatever they put out.

    2. Not happening! This incident has completely soured me on the idea of writing anything more for the time being. If you ever see any writing from me again, it’ll just appear when I want to post it and won’t be tied to any group “theme”.

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    It gets worse. There are some at AICN who believe you, I, Technoreaper, and even that Mickey Mouse George Lucas hating weirdo are one and the same. And someone even accused me of being Asimov, due to my JJ tirades, believe it or not

  • Turd Has Escaped The Gravy

    There are certainly individuals who create multiple sock puppets to fuck around with people. Some are obvious, others a little more subtle. But to sustain it for this length of time (and being able to post that quickly in reply to each other)? That would take some doing.

    Still, it doesn’t stop some paranoids from believing whatever they want, regardless of the evidence. (Yes, we still get accused of being one and the same from time to time at AICN, largely because we both attack Abrams in violation of the group think there.) I guess that’s why we have so many people who believe in unfounded conspiracy theories.

  • KilliK

    lol, those conspiracy lunatics are out of control. what amazes me is that they cant stand the fact that there can be more than one who opposes their opinion. are they so vain?

  • KilliK

    1. my only mistake is that I presumed that you were contacted for this article and declined the offer. apparently you didnt and I apologized for it. Your OWN mistake is that you labeled my inquiries for new articles as aggressive demands. An exaggerating assumption from your part and I explained why. You want to insist to it, fine, I have no problem with that. ok, we are clear on that?

    So, that leaves the “mistake which I defend with self-righteous justification”. which mistake is that,Turd? because you are right, I dont get this part.

    2. no, I didnt have to put emoticons, exactly because it was obvious that there was never a malicious intention behind it since it’s how I usually write. if you tongue-in-cheek detector failed, as I already said, that’s your problem, not mine. yes, there was a pattern and context and a psychoanalysis and everything, but I have a simpler explanation: I hit a nerve.

    as for changing the other comment to soften the situation, yes it’s true I didnt want to give continuation to our quarrel, not that the the original comment was aggressive , I remember it was me saying that I do know what a fallacy is.

    actually, Creepy does insult me the whole time with very harsh language , but guess what, I dont mind at all because I know the dude is cool and there is no true animosity from his part when he does that. it’s all for fun and I realize because we are not strangers anymore, we have been part of this small community for many years. so yes, if you call someone who meets you for the first time a fuckign cunt, yes his first impression of your person wont be positive. so your example was unfortunate.

    3. you were not ordered. this is the truth, take it or leave it. but on the other hand if you dont want to be “harassed” for this subject, just dont leave empty promises that you want to write articles in the future.

    4.LOL. like you have written articles before to stop now.well, at least I ll stop “forcing” you to write them, now that I know you are never gonna to do it.

  • Tarmac492.1

    You are the keyzer soze of talkbacking 🙂 Reading over the posts at AICN lately, i think that only 27% of the people there are rational. The crazy ones are pretty entertaining, however. Much more than any of the articles. However, that last fact has been the case at AICN for over ten years. I learn more about shit from your posts than anything over at AICN or most other places, so I am glad that you post here.

  • Stalkeye

  • spinkles

    I find the term “furry, scampering ancestors” offensive. I wouldn’t be surprised if someone became uncomfortable, even….????